wondering out loud

Hello and good evening folks. Nice, cold, wet day at hyderabad today. Wasn't it? Today was also one of those days guys. One of those weird days, when you feel, stalled. Stopped. You feel like things have suddenly paused and sadly, you're not part of the pause-programme. You're still around, watching. It's not boring I'm talking about, mind you. What I'm saying is, it's like a sense of dejavoo. And yet it's not like you've already sensed and experienced what is happening. But in bits, you've seen this day beofore. It's a cranky kind of a feeling altogether. I don't know if a few minutes of lesser sleep can produce such interesting results on the psyche. But then, I was never a person who slept at regular hours and times. In fact, I boasted of my being nocturnal! Then what's with all this 'chemical locha' in the 'dimag'. I don't know if lack of junk food for a couple days is to blame for this. Yes. Maybe that is it. You know guys? To a foodie who practically lives off junk and lives by the nocturnal hours, regulated life and safe and healthy foods CAN prove hazardous.

But this has to be more than that. More than just food, I mean. I don't know how many would nod and think, 'me too', when I say this. But so soo many a time it feels like you need a shrink in life. For what? I don't know. Don't ask me! To get a hold of what you think is flying away. To understand what you're into? To realise yourself to the full? Ya. That sounds a little more convincing and solid than the previous two. But, after living with ourselves for how many ever years they are, and not being able to figure out what we are, how the hell is some other god-knows-who chap going to help us out. Okay, maybe not exactly a god-knows-who kinda' chap. But still, he is a stranger who knows not one single thing about you. What am I talking about? I really don't think I know. And neither might you. Yes, I have been sleep deprived by a half hour or so. And I'm seriously deprived of my source of sustenance, my junk food. And I'm feeling the effects badly. Man! Healthy life sucks! Ain't it?